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[Intro] (Gated snare hits once, piano holds a suspended chord) [Verse] I filed the papers with a notary's seal The minor variance—my heart was real The window well, four inches too tight Ontario Building Code, egress not right The planner's desk is an ocean of time Every morning inbox, a pantomime The Property Standards division stays mute My second unit, trapped in dispute [Chorus] Re: Egress deficiency four inches from the law The clear unobstructed opening leaves a fatal flaw We await the stamp, the blessed stamp Pending determination on a basement so damp This dwelling shall not be until the planner's mercy falls [Verse] I measure the well with a certified tape The steel frame mocks my escape Inspection once came, left a Notice of Concern Now I burn, oh I burn, for the stamped return A neighbour wrote in, objecting to light But the Committee of Adjustment may set it right I recite O. Reg. 332/12 in the dark The only fire is the one inside this mark [Chorus] Re: Egress deficiency four inches from the law The clear unobstructed opening leaves a fatal flaw We await the stamp, the blessed stamp Pending determination on a basement so damp This dwelling shall not be until the planner's mercy falls [Bridge] (Key change, guitar solo begins) I dream of the day the permit is issued Every stud and drywall screw, no longer misused The second unit rises from code's purgatory But for now, just the four-inch category (Guitar solo crescendo, then piano alone) [Outro] I'll check the portal once more at midnight Hoping the status changes to "Approved" light Until then, I'll live in this unpermitted dream A minor variance, a bureaucratic scream (Final gated snare hit, fade on piano)
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