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Giuseppe "The Slab" Pagano · Blog

The Seaway Hotel Tactical Withdrawal of '87

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The Toolbox (Left in the Seaway Hotel, 1987)

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November 1987. I was laying commercial carpet tile in Sault Ste. Marie. Pure desperation. A concrete man has no business touching glue-down synthetics, but the economy was soft.

I was staying at the Seaway Hotel near the bridge. I met a woman in the lounge who drank rye and water and talked extensively about her ex-husband's bankrupt snowmobile dealership.

Naturally, I hid my seventy-pound burgundy Snap-on box in the bottom dresser drawer of my room. You do not leave grip-in-mold steel in the back of a truck in the Sault overnight. That box held my father’s offset driver and a ball-peen hammer cracked perfectly up the middle.

Things escalated. Around 4:00 AM, the woman suggested we move to Wawa and start a commercial laundering business. I realized I was in immediate danger of a second marriage.

I executed a tactical withdrawal. I quietly laced up my boots, grabbed my jacket, and walked out to the idling six-cylinder before the sun came up. I did not look back.

By the time I hit Batchawana Bay, the adrenaline crashed. Cold reality set in. The dresser drawer.

I had left my actual limbs at the Seaway. People ask if I ever think about the woman. I don't even remember her face. But thirty years on, I still wake up in a cold sweat, reaching for a fish tape coiled perfectly like a set of rosary beads.

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Catalog: NM-00024

GOCHU

SnaccRave

0:00
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Liner Notes
[Intro]
Crackle, crackle, sssss—
Three fifty, yeah, hit the oil hot
MSG, hit the beep!
No fork, just fingers, let's go

[Verse]
Sunday midnight, kitchen lights flicker
Twitch chat's wild, thumbs moving quicker
First fry low, batter galeando
Peanut oil shimmer like a golden chancleta
Pat the bird down, cornstarch snowing
Double-dip wet to dry for that crunch growing
Ladle clank the wok—snare locked in
Timing so precise, even my parrot grins

[Pre-Chorus]
Pull it out, rest up, let the steam whisper
Drain on the rack, hear the skin blister
Second heat climbing, thermometer rising
Drip, drip, drip—the sauce is materializing

[Chorus]
Dip it, flip it, sauce it hot
Gochujang glisten, give it all you got
Dip it, flip it, sticky pop
Soft-ball stage, baby, don't you stop
Two-forty, watch the caramel lock
Toss it, gloss it, midnight wok
Crunch gloop sizzle—that's the plot
No fork, no napkins, just the drip drop

[Verse]
Fermented chili paste hissing in the pan (ssss!)
Brown sugar, soy, garlic—that's the master plan
Chat says "más ajo, dale, dale"—I obey
Miami moonlight through the kitchen window ray
MSG whistles when the thermometer beeps
Smart speakers all down the block wake from their sleeps
Tostón-snap test for the perfect bite
Same crunch science, different appetite

[Pre-Chorus]
Toss that crispy bird in the sticky, spicy glaze
Coat to coat, every piece through the haze
Sesame seeds raining like a hi-hat roll
This is culinary bass music, body and soul

[Chorus]
Dip it, flip it, sauce it hot
Gochujang glisten, give it all you got
Dip it, flip it, sticky pop
Soft-ball stage, baby, don't you stop
Two-forty, watch the caramel lock
Toss it, gloss it, midnight wok
Crunch gloop sizzle—that's the plot
No fork, no napkins, just the drip drop

[Bridge]
Flour on my cheek, sauce on my chin
Send the plate flying, let the rave begin
Cheese pull? Wrong stream. Tonight it's chili threads
Korean heart, Cuban sazón running through my breads
Glaze the thumb, hit the spacebar, drop the beat
Emulsify the flavor, make the frequencies eat

[Outro]
Glisten, glisten, glisten—pop!
Two-forty, two-forty—don't stop!
Sssss, crunch, beep
Just the sauce, just the drip, just the fingers
Just the crunch, just the beat
MSG, cut the heat
(Papá, otra vez, otra vez—
Otra vez, dale, dale!)
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